22 November 2010

how does one sigh without an 's'?

i have so many unposted drafts that i feel silly knowing that i'll actually finish this one.  But it's my blog and I'll cry if I want to.  Nora had her first playdate without me at a nonfamily member's home this morning.  The children had a wonderful time and even I survived (although I was more 'aware' of her absence than ever.)  The reason I did not accompany her is that the other child is painfully shy and we were hoping that they might have a better time if she didn't have to worry about unknown me.  What I love is that her mom approached me and said that her daughter is terribly shy and barely speaks at school, but when she gets home, she has tons and tons to say about Nora.  So fun to watch her navigate the world of 'others.'  On the way home, we discussed what she did with her new friend and how much fun she had.  And then we had this conversation:

Nora:  What do you fink she fought a you?
Me:  I don't know.  What do you think she thought of me?
Nora:  She pwobabwy fought you were different.
Me:  Oh yeah?  How am I different?
Nora:  You don't talk wike her mom.  I talk wike her but not you.
*oof*
Me:  You're right.  I do talk different from you and others.  It's one of the ways that people are different.

and on we went to another topic.  I have a cleft palate and lip and in addition to a very nasally voice, I have impediments all sorts of letters, but especially "s."  I've been waiting for this moment for most of my life.   And really, I'm proud that my daughter handled it kindly and directly.  And so it was fine.  Totally fine.  Except that I went from being in a really great groove over here to feeling like I might fall over from a need for sleep.  My brain knows so much more so much better than my body but my body wants to crawl into a dark tunnel and cry and cry.

4 comments:

Rachael said...

Kids are so honest, aren't they? I have several moles on my face and it seems that little kids and babies like to point it out and ask loudly "what's that?" or if I'm holding a baby or my baby, they like to touch it. Makes me incredibly self conscious. I bet if I asked your daughter who is the most beautiful person in the world, she would say "My mommy!"

Lolita Breckenridge said...

Brody asks repeatedly what "that" is on my belly. I reply it's a mole. And then he literally falls over sideways pointing at it and laughing hysterically. When I have a zit, he asks me what it is, and makes a face at it.

Anyway, you're also different because you've got more heart and soul and passion for life than almost anyone else I've ever (never?) met. Don't forget that part, even if you do have to crawl into the tunnel for a wee bit.

And THANK YOU for blogging. I've missed you.

Unknown said...

Your daughter is very intuitive, as well as being kind and thoughtful. Good job, Mama!

I hope Joe has a 4-day weekend so that you can get a break and some good sleep, friend. <3

Jess said...

I am so sorry that I am just now reading this.

Sarah- You are beautiful and amazing and one of the coolest people I know. Our differences are what make each of us beautiful. I am honored to have been able to meet you, get to know you and become friends with you. And I know that Nora is proud to call you her mom <3

 
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